The Diocese of Des Moines

Marriage Guidelines

A wedding date is to be set no sooner than six months from the initial contact with the priest/deacon/pastoral minister preparing the couple.  Couples should begin their marriage preparation at their home parish by contacting the pastor.

Couples are required to participate in an educational process prior to their marriage/validation. Options available to meet this requirement are either a sponsor couple or a premarriage educational workshop. Sponsor couple marriage preparation is the preferred option.

Currently sacramental marriage preparation retreats are planned for 2014. They are:

  • October 11th, 2014 at St. Pius Parish, 3663 66th St, Urbandale, IA 50322.
  • November 6th and 13th, from 6-8:30 PM in Des Moines, at the Catholic Pastoral Center, 601 Grand Ave. in Des Moines.  (note:  for this course engaged couples must attend both sessions)
  • December 6th, 2014 in Des Moines, exact location TBD. 
  • January 17th, 2015 in Des Moines, exact location TBD.
  • February 21st, 2015 in Des Moines, exact location TBD.
  • March 3rd and 5th, from 6-8:30 PM in Des Moines, exact location TBD.  (note:  for this course engaged couples must attend both sessions)
  • April 18th, 2015 in Des Moines, exact location TBD.
  • May 16th, 2015 in Des Moines, exact location TBD.
  • June 13th, 2015 in Des Moines, exact location TBD.

The cost of this course is $80 per couple.  Scholarships are available to couples, and can be requested by contacting Adam Storey at astorey@dmdiocese.org.  Please register for classes on the diocesan calendar found on this website.

 

If couples cannot meet with a sponsor couple, an additional life skills course is also recommended.  The cost of this workshop is $60 per couple.  Scholarships are available to couples, and can be requested by contacting Adam Storey at astorey@dmdiocese.org.  Please register for classes on the diocesan calendar found on this website.

 

Current life skills courses are planned for 2014.  They are: 

  • November 15th, from 1-5 PM at the Catholic Pastoral Center, 601 Grand Ave. in Des Moines.
  • January 18th, 2015 from 1-5 PM in Des Moines, exact location TBD.
  • April 19th, 2015 from 1-5 PM in Des Moines, exact location TBD.

Additional assistance

 

In order to make marriage preparation as valuable as possible, the diocese makes an effort to address each couple's particular circumstances.  With this in mind, additional training and resources are available for sponsor couples who work with couples where one or both:

  • Pregnant or bringing a child(ren) into the marriage

  • Entering a second or subsequent marriage(includes widow or widower)

  • Seeking validation in the Catholic Church when there has been a previous marriage

  • Referred by priest/deacon/pastoral minister


Validation

 

When an engaged couple is civilly married but not Sacramentally married marriage preparation can be adjusted to better suit their needs.  It should be made clear that the couple is not seeking a blessing of the covenant that already exists, but is entering a new, sacramental covenant that has not yet taken place.  To better minister to these couples, the engaged couple should enter one of the following programs:

  • Work with a sponsor couple who is able to address the unique circumstance of a validating couple. The primary emphasis needs to be on the sacramentality of marriage.

  • When a couple has been in a civil union less than TWO years, FOCCUS is required. When the civil union has been longer than two years, REFOCCUS is recommended.

  • If the sponsor couple becomes aware that there are factors present in the relationship that may require further assistance, the priest/ deacon/ pastoral minister will be informed. He/she will then refer the couple to Marriage Ministry.

Natural Family Planning

 

Within marriage there is a moral responsibility to regulate procreation, but because of the dishonest and immoral nature of atrificial contraception, which has been confirmed in the constant teaching of the Christ and His Church, only natural means of regulating births are morally licit.  The following resources can help couples learn about Natural Family Planning, which is an effective and moral way to participate in God's plan for sexual intimacy:

 

 

            Fertility Services of Central Iowa:  Creighton Model FertilityCare System


            Teachers in the diocese:  Julie Craven:  515-554-5099 or naproworks@msn.com
                                                           Michelle McKernan:  515-225-3261 or vitaefcp-m@qwestoffice.net
                                                           (In Council Bluffs) Fertility Care Center of Omaha:  402-392-0842

 

 

            Couple to Couple League: Sympto-Thermal Method


            Teachers in the diocese:  Mark and Patty Conway:  515-245-3016
                                                           Kerry and Renee McGuire:  515-278-1623
                                                                                                                        
            Billings Ovulation Method or Billings Ovulation Method USA

 

 

            Teachers in the diocese:  Betty McGehe:  515-240-2751
                                                           (Spanish in Council Bluffs) - Yolanda Bello-Bogdanyi 712-322-5378

 

Northwest Family Servies:  Symto-Thermal Method

 

Teachers in the diocese: Kristin Detloff (In Pella). More information can be found at                                                   www.lovenaturallynfp.com.

 

Online courses are also available in English or Spanish through the Couple to Couple league and the Billings Ovulation Method can be learned online through Marriage Ministries.  Also, couples can learn the Sympto Thermal Method through Northwest Family Services.  

 

Home study courses are available in English or Spanish through the Couple to Couple league and through the Billings Ovulation Method.

 

For more information about NFP and NFP doctors and teachers, please visit the webiste One More Soul.  For more information about the NFP lifestyle, please visit the website Living the Sacrament.

 

For more local information, contact Adam Storey in the diocesan Marriage Ministry Office at 515-237-5056 or e-mail him at astorey@dmdiocese.org.