Marriage Guidelines
A wedding date is to be set no sooner than six months from the initial contact with the priest/deacon/pastoral minister preparing the couple.
Couples are required to participate in an educational process prior to their marriage/validation. Options available to meet this requirement are sponsor couple, pre-marriage workshops, and validation workshops. Sponsor couple marriage preparation is the preferred option.
When the workshop is used, the engaged couple must still take a FOCCUS and the person conducting the initial interview should discuss the results with the couple in a series of meetings.
All couples are required to complete the FOCCUS inventory and discuss the results with preparing person or sponsor couple.
Two marriage preparation retreats are planned for 2012. They are:
- March 24 & 31 at the Catholic Pastoral Center, 601 Grand Ave. in Des Moines
- June 16 & 23 in Council Bluffs
Assessment
Couples need to participate in an assessment process at Marriage Ministry if either are:
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Age 21 or under
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Pregnant or bringing a child(ren) into the relationship
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Entering a second or subsequent marriage(includes widow or widower)
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Seeking validation in the Catholic Church when there has been a previous marriage
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Referred by priest/deacon/pastoral minister
Validation
When couples seek a valid union, they must participate in the following process:
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Work with a trained validating sponsor couple. The primary emphasis needs to be on the sacramentality of marriage.
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When a couple has been in a civil union less than TWO years, FOCCUS is required. When the civil union has been longer than two years, REFOCCUS or Personality Inventory given by Marriage Ministry office.
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If the sponsor couple becomes aware that there are factors present in the relationship that may require further assistance, the priest/ deacon/ pastoral minister will be informed. He/she will then refer the couple to Marriage Ministry.
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