Marriage & Family Life: Allowing God to Write My Saint Story

by Diocese of Des Moines | October 18, 2022

Every night during bedtime prayers, our two-year-old daughter, Marigold, insists on leading our family’s Litany of Saints. As she tries to remember which saint comes next on the list, she’ll inevitably glance up at the ceiling before taking a quick peek at the faces surrounding her.

“Saint. . .Gabriel, pray for us. Saint. . .Ceci, pray for us. Saint. . .Gemma, pray for us. Saint. . .Zita, pray for us. Saint. . .Mary, pray for us. Saint. . .Lulu, pray for us. Saint. . .Mama, pray for us. Saint. . .Daddy, pray for us.”

While she’s caught on that our children are all named after saints, I haven’t yet informed her that she has no authority to canonize us. I actually find Marigold’s sweet, though dissident, prayers a weighty reminder of the goal and hope Adam and I have for our family: to one day be counted among the saints in heaven.

That may sound lovely and upbeat, but I’m often intimidated by our universal call to sainthood. The beloved saints we read about suffered incredible trials. St. Teresa of Calcutta experienced the dark night of the soul. St. Zélie Martin buried four of her children. St. Jane Frances de Chantal spent much of her life afflicted with anxiety and depression. Recalling their lives, I’m tempted to fear. 

What will be asked of me? 

What will I have to give up? 

“Give me the crown, but not the cross, oh Lord!” my flesh cries out.

Thankfully, God isn’t asking me to be Teresa, Zélie or even Jane. He’s asking me to be Kara of Des Moines, promising me the grace to suffer whatever trials come my way. 

In “On the Call to Holiness in Today’s World,” Pope Francis writes, “There are some testimonies that may prove helpful and inspiring, but we are not meant to copy, for that could even lead us astray from the one specific path that the Lord has in mind for us. The important thing is that each believer discerns his or her own path, that they bring out the very best of themselves, the most personal gifts that God has placed in their hearts, rather than hopelessly trying to imitate something not meant for them.”

Trust me, the Lord is giving me more than enough saint-making moments in my little home on 52nd Street. The baby waking multiple times at night, never-ending crumbs on the floor and navigating sibling squabbles are just a start. Pope Francis refers to these moments as opportunities for “everyday holiness,” again writing, “I like to contemplate the holiness present in the patience of God’s people: in those parents who raise their children with immense love, in those men and women who work hard to support their families, in the sick, in elderly religious who never lose their smile. In their daily perseverance, I see the holiness of the Church militant.”

Some days I persevere, but more often I hit the ground under the weight of the tiniest cross. Fortunately, he’s there to pick me up when I fall. 

As we look ahead to the feasts of All Saints and All Souls Day, may we all have the courage to pray, “Lord, make me the saint you want me to be. Make my family the saints you know we can be.”

Kara Storey is a freelance writer who worships at the Basilica of St. John in Des Moines.